Creedleon : Memory 04

I just noticed that I put 'memory' for the title of these things.
Actually, not all of these are memories, some are just ideas there will be more of those, memories and ideas, I'm just putting things that came across my mind.

Well, lets get it on...

Things hasn't been good to me lately, too many problems hitting me from many sides.
My insecure core is getting hit bad, maybe life is training me the hard way, really need to keep everything in moderation.

In many areas, I think that I'm making too many efforts in vain, as if I'm trying to shoot a water gun to a tsunami.



I have never felt so insignificant in my life before.
I'm fighting with all my might to show a smile and receiving a grim face in return each time.
I'm restraining, praying that I have more strength, but it's corroding me, consuming everything I hold close to my heart.
I'm trying, God knows I'm trying not to throw back these pains I've been feeling.

Some things indeed are small, trivial matter... But at least I always try to keep my words. I always try to remain true, to mine own words, why can't some people understand that?

I'm trying, I'm trying to break free from how I used to be, and I'm doing it too fast in a too painful way but I'm trying and I'm succeeding with bleeding scars all around, but it doesn't really matter, is it?

Sometimes it's too much I can hardly bear it, but I did, and I always survive.
Whatever life throw at me, I've always been there to take it head on and survive, maybe I'm not a winner, but surviving is good enough I guess, don't you think?

Now lets see how life would treat me, I'll be knocked down, beaten up but I'll always get up eventually.
However, I'm afraid that this quest may just let me come undone.
The one punch that I may not survive has finally arrived.

I've never expose so much of me, I'm actually afraid that if something hit me from under the shadow, it would just end me...

I lay my all on this one, one small touch would reverberate through my whole existence.

I can only put it in my prayers.